Monday, October 31, 2016

Looking Back part 1

How will I look back?

I talked with my mom today.  She was looking back.  She began with regret.  Those things that she wished were not so in her lifetime.  She knows she has heaven but she is sad that some things, very important things, were not realized this side of heaven.
Of course my heart breaks a bit.  She says, "love ya, love ya, love ya" and we say good-bye.  How many more times will I hear "Love ya, love ya, love ya."  I would like to bottle that as I want to bottle up my kiddos growing sometimes.



My heart is grieved because my mom is speaking of an ending.  She is at that point of looking back and that is her reality and our reality.  I will never be ready to say good-bye to my mom even though there are painful days of how she has to exist with the disease of Alzheimer's.  My heart is also sad because she will not receive the hope she had of a whole marriage. 

It made me then ponder, How will I look back.  I am totally in the thick of things right now in my life.  I am "all in" everyday.  I have three bodies and minds looking to me to guide and instruct in the next step.  These are those days my mom is looking back to and I have opportunities with God's hand to mold and shape the days.  To answer the question, how do I want to look back...by how I am living today.



Today after listening to a podcast I was struck with the thought, Let me be worthy of the calling.  I am the one giving the first messages on a daily/hourly basis about learning, creativity, and who they are in Christ.  I want to encourage and bring good things out.  To emphasize the important.  To not say one things and do another.  The woman being interviewed (on the podcast) has written an amazing Bible for children.  She said she didn't spell well and her head was in the clouds a lot when she was young.  And today she is being so used mightily by God.  I need the vision, perspective, and trust that I can lead my three trusting we don't always have to have it perfect, finish the book, go in order....We can be used mightily by God because of Him not because of ME. 






It brings so much into question of what I believe about myself and what I believe to be important and how sometimes I rely on outside things to give me meaning or value.  I am home schooling for myself!  For God to do a work in me and my kids get to go along for the ride!
Today is the day I want to look back on and smile.

Cambria these days

Happiness lies in being present with the people she loves!








(Watching Bobo in his karate class.)

 
She was enjoying for a bit wearing a blanket over her
 head and walking around...she is so funny.  She also
loves to have blankets wrapped around her shoulders.
She loves finding little places to sit, where
she can find a ledge. 

Cambria loves lifting her hands in praise!
One of my favorite things.  
Learning how to draw.
 

She loves to hold my hand when nursing.
She likes putting on my clothes. 

The girl loves to swing...
recently she is loving this cocoon! 
Cambria also loves to suck on wet paper towel
or wash cloths.
She has loved riding around in this baby
stroller- it is on its last leg as it has
been well loved as an original gift
to Deveraux.  One Christmas, I wanted Dev to
have  a really great baby stroller.  So
I splurged and got this one from
Pottery Barn.
Bobo said, "You are surrounded by people who love you."
 
 
 

Sunday, October 23, 2016

More September into October...

He cleaned his room!

I celebrated my beautiful mama on September 22nd.
It so stinks that she has Alzheimer's, it just sometimes
doesn't even seem like it is a reality.  But other days
it is such our new reality that we have to remember
what it was like before.  I love my mom so very
much and I miss that she can't be my mom as much
as she used to be- but there are still enough traces
of her that I can cling to and be in the moment with her.
I love you mom.
Feed my Sheep has been a good place to
volunteer.  Unfortunately, they are moving
to another site and it will be harder for our
schedule to keep going.  I so want my kids
to be involved in service and ministry.

Fall décor made its way out because Deveraux was hosting
a father/daughter book club.


They read, "The One and Only Ivan."


My only blurry pic of all the daughters and dads.
Then they did a little photo booth time.




Dev put signs around with quotes
from the book.

She spelled out with letters,
Please Help Yourself on the food island.
One day on the way to the other side, I looked in
the back and I said, "We have three kids!"

Pier One loveliness.

Sabbath
Bobo received a knife that he will not be able
to "officially" have until 13 or 14 or somewhere
around that age.  He is loving knives right now.
We had a bit of a battle - "can I open the package
and just look at it?"  "Can I just show papa and
then you put it away?"  Since purchasing the
knife and tool contraption, Andrew graciously
has allowed Bobo to use it on our camping
trip and other special occasions.

Let's go hiking!  Sabbath weekend!





I overheard Dev telling Bobo,
"Bobo stop so we can work things out."
I love that she was trying in the midst of conflict,
 In many ways they are opposites and yet when they
 both choose love and one another, it works!
She is loving her car!
And we loved this pool...some friends went out
of town and left their pool key under the flower
pot.  We took advantage and went several times!







I loved this.  I also hope I am gracious in
letting my little go....

He wanted to make a fire truck cake for the Sabbath cake.
It was one that we had seen a "how to" video for
several years ago.  We attempted it and it was
pretty good although the picture looks a bit rough.
Morning prayers in the driveway before dada leaves.

"Are you real?" said the mama to the baby?

Another morning ritual.
Bye bye dada as she waves.

The smile I am blessed with when she wakes.


"Worms in dirt."
House projects


I love how she takes time and creates beautiful work.



Cheesy boy
She was all about the candles in September.


Photo shoot with the army truck.

Feed my sheep
A big bear hug to our van which we decided to sell.
We all felt a little sad about this great car that had led
us on our greatest road trip (to date) and our first van.
The kids loved this car but alas it needed a lot of work
and we recently bought a new version of the same van.
But good thing we get to keep the memories even
if we aren't keeping the van.





We then went to Outback to celebrate.
Dev thought it was funny they brought Cambria
a big water.

Our crazy booth moments.

Yup, this is Bobo almost every morning.
Look at how he is growing!
She loves putting on my clothes.

I am finally liking how our bottom lanai is
coming together...plants really help.
CLIMBERS!


She is learning calligraphy!

LEGOS are still in style around here!
Sometimes the loads of laundry just
get moved around until there is
space to fold.
Plants are in style also!

I was really excited about this meal one night.
It felt fresh and that I had used things we already
had in our cabinets.  I was pretty excited because
honestly cooking meals does not come easy.
Well, my excitement did not match how well the
meal was received.  But I thought it was pretty good.
There she is lifting those hands again.
Another Sabbath hike to Dragons teeth, about 10 minutes from us.









Then the girls had some fun waiting on the boys.


Drew took a new position in December at
work which means he has not had Sundays
off.  He was able to have two off in October
so he could help in Sunday School.
We are praying he will move into a place
where he can have Sundays off again soon.
Baby Moses in the water.  Cambria made
it into the skit again.

First time wagon riding.  She really enjoys
riding in things.
And she enjoys finding little ledges to sit on.

My girl wants to be a photographer.

Dev brushing her teeth for the first time, she liked it.
 
Waiting for Bobo who is in karate.


Her napping spot during school.




I wonder how long I will be able to hold him
like this.  He was a bit sad about his special book
 I picked out for him this year,  sometimes you just miss it
and its just disappointing.
Dev captured on film Cambria crawling under my chair
during my weekly meeting together at the church
with other women.



This boy is preparing for his second time at the
ukulele contest.  He set up his lights and called
me in and I got to hold the mic!


Dev fixed my hair.
We were introduced to the world of macramé!
Our sweet friend came over, brought supplies,
and showed us how.

I came home from my run around the
neighborhood and these three were having
breakfast together.
In Maui we tend to go to the same beach in a season.
We had not been to Napili Bay in quite some time.
A friend suggested we go and we had a great time.
I am continually reminded even after all our years of living
here how beautiful Maui is-that to me is fingerprints of our Creator.
A I never tire of seeing my kiddos engage in nature.


Bobo pretended this whole area was his training for
the coast guard.
Hanging pot!