Gigi!

We just love you Fall!

I try and visit mom as many days as I can.

The visits aren't usually long but they are now

the only way I can be close to her.

Mom said to me, "Where have you been?" when I 

first saw her.  I took it as a good thing.

She remembered our connection.  She also told

me we would need to have some chats. 

Another time, Mom said, "I did good with you girls."

I want to remember what she says and write it 

down because her communication is so limited. 

These are the glimpses into her.  

She also told me her "brain was stupid."

and the nurse told me she said,

"She didn't want to be human anymore."

So very sad.  She still has a bit of awareness of

this sad sad condition. 

Mom was saying things like I feel so bad and I am worried about the kids and something like, "I didn’t do something." It just struck me in different ways.  For one, how many of our “demons are with us for our life or are unsettled business still can haunt us. Also, I realize how much I miss her voice. And then I just realize how much I want her released from this earthly body… I feel like she is trapped and I just want to want to get her out. It is just so terribly sad. When I am in her presence I am so reminded of the Father and how things were never meant to be this way and it makes me realize human limitations and such a longing for heaven for those who can no longer move and have meaning in this world. I just wanted to affirm to mom that she had done all she could and the kids (she was worried about) were great and safe and she did what she could, I wanted to release her and release her for heaven.  

(that is a mom look)

Kids being silly, they lighten up the room!

Bobo wanted to show Gigi from the window.

And she saw. 

She is still in the land of the living.